confession: his name is devon miles.
listening to: incubus-battle scralatchtica

jay looks like devon miles. ha. rockstars, sure.

so, yesterday was another boring day. i didn't move until 8 p.m. i left to go to barnes and bought my textbook for school. thank you barnes and noble discount card. i hung out with lex until 2:15 a.m. and came home. i just got off the phone with rosh, he's on his way back to boring san diego. yippy, joy.

plans for this weekend:
today: i hope to catch some show.
sunday: there's a hip hop show rosh and i might check out with dj shadow and inthevisualz off moreno blvd.
monday: magic mnt. with lex most likely.

. . . and then tuesday rolls by. my first day of school, this time it's going to be different. i'm actually going to try? i know i've said that each semester, but man, this is poor. i've never seen letters like these in my 15 years of academic life. this semester i'm going to pass all 5 classes: intro. to ethnic studies, white privelege - where i will be sharing my thoughts on America and diversity, history 130 - american history, history 202 - world civilizations 1500 - present, and finally tae kwon do. can you believe i have to sit through 2 hours of lecture for that class? i also have to write a 5-page essay. it's a csusm requirement, that for every class you take you have to write a paper of 2,500 words or more. crazy.

hair situation: i think i'm going to keep it long. i've never had long hair before. my hair has always been short, well not 5 inches past my shoulders.

lex situation: for all of you who have been asking how i'm doing with lex, we are fine.

however, last night my insecurity kicked in when he was talking about his ex-gf. she seems really hot, something i am not. it makes me wonder, why even bother to go out with someone like me if you can have someone like that. thanks rosh for the comfort, i guess it will do for now. but anyways, i've always told myself to go for the best, don't settle for less. so ya, i wonder why he's settling for me. it kept bugging me last night. i didn't feel good enough for him. ya, i'm crazy like that. it's like opening presents. you go from opening the garage finding the car of your dreams to opening a box of sticks, what's better? i don't understand why. argh, i curse all you people with extra appendages. you've driven me insane, i tell you, INSANE! what good is it to be in love? what do you get out of it? man, sometimes i wonder what am i doing getting involved in a relationship? i'm not good with those, i can't deal. eh, even the lonely crave some lovin'.