Emotion:none.
Random Thought:
What:roberta flack-where is the love ft. my nephews

so i was thinking, where does a person's passion come from? is it driven from selfishness, righteous acts, outer influences, etc.?

I've just been doing some self-reflecting, as always reiterating to myself my purpose. I believe that every person is here for a reason, without their existence the world would not be. though we'd like to perceive ourselves as individuals there is an interconnectedness that does not let us forget. i know there are individuals who are able to continue living without granting recognition to those who came before them, but i simply cannot. i realize that my existence would not be had it not been for God's creation (we'll talk about that later), I would not be if my ancestor decided to leave Brunei for Philippines, or simply if my parents decided to have another child after 7 years.

Of course, there are many moments in life that I would like to forget but i cannot. they've all happened for a reason, there are the stories that complete my book.

yep. my dear friend em gave me the best definition "an unfinished book" (we can refer to cooley's looking glass theory and examine how i've internalized this definition as well) ya, life is a book, a series of stories that write our novels.

as for God, I believe in the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit but that does not mean that I do not acknowledge Buddah or Ganesh or what not. I see no purpose in trying to convert others to fulfill gracious acts of devotion. There is nothing wrong with having a conversation about religion but just don't press it on people. Simple words and expressions can communicate your relationship to religion. As we are entitled the Freedom of Speech in U.S.'s Constitution we are also entitled to the freedom of religion. Though I realize that we are still in many ways restricted to practice the freedom of expression. I haven't been following this issue immensely however I do recall that Kentucky has placed the ten commandments outside its federal buildings. I, for one, do not agree with this. We, as believers in Jesus, are imposing our religion upon others, just as Bush imposes an unjust war on Iraq. ( that has no place in this but i felt it neccessary considering that Bush admitted to making a mistake)

yes.

life is just so interesting.

my trip to san francisco was a tease. i felt like i was at a peep show that only lasted a couple of days. i can say this now because of what i have experienced, i see san francisco as another educational center for me. i'm not so sure about settling there but for now i'm content with going to school there. on the other hand, there is a philippine educational center for kindergarten to fifth grade. i would love to have my children learn tagalog and english as well as filipino culture, seeing as how i cannot sufficiently pass on our traditions. I suppose you can say that I hold on so dearly to what I have of my culture because that is all that I have. I've grown up in multiculturalism but then reverted to what seemed like an ethnic enclave of filipinos during middle school. but after having been exposed to what i know i see the need for me to hold onto my filipinaness. i only now understanding why my mother and lolas are so strong, why they are the ones who carry the family but await their husbands approval. philippines was once a matriachy before the united states imposed a partiarchal government of democracy. but we still carry it in our blood.

i suppose i can relate this to my relationship with lex. i often times felt as if i was the one in control, i was making the decisions which i soon grew weary of. but you need to consider that i am heavily influenced by my mother and ate rianne as well as lex's experience with his mother, a very strong woman as well.

at times i would like to revoke this heritage from me and just BE, but to be honest i think i'd feel even more lost then than now.

i was listening to a cd i bought from archipelago bookstore, a series of poems and recorded poems. i honestly started to tear a bit. i do miss what i do not know.