today's a new day. i don't know what to say or how to start it off. i'm at UCLA right now for roshidi's tekken 4 tournament. he just left to sign up and karina is somewhere. i'm just hanging out in her room. being here exposes me to what REAL college life is. an opportunity missed, like many others. i'm afraid of it, but at the same time it's a big temptation, an exciting adventure for me to experience what college is really about. college, somewhere other than a local san diego school. i'm ready to see new things, meet new personalities, do it all. i can. but i limit myself from doing everything. i think what holds me back above all things is myself. i know i am capable of doing whatever i wish, but i don't. for example, on the way home from the new found glory concert, i was thinking that i can be as promiscuous as i wanted to be. i can "fuck" as many people as i want, and i probably could have, but i didn't. i'm the border partrol officer. i don't allow myself to be that way, that's why i'm not that way. i talked about this with roshidi and well. . he changed the subject. we both knew it was true. we could be promiscuous if we wanted. i guess it all depends on your personality. if you believe you can do it, you can. there shouldn't be any reason why you can't. don't even think about those. no doubts, because you can. i don't think there's anything in this world i can't do. it would take time of course in order to prepare, learn, and adjust. (sometimes shit just happens and you have no time to prepare). adaptability - how well you can adjust to change. i admit i have a hard time adapting to change, but i learn. no matter what life hands you, you will be able to get through it. you have to have the desire in yourself to pull through. yes, it's a nice thing to know that people have faith in you, but it's just an additional 50 cent sprinkle for your ice cream. it may help, but you are the only person who can help yourself. you can make anything happen. it's your life. it's your world. it's your story.
so yes. new subject now. i'm getting hungry and i'm tired. karina's playing that john mayer song that's on the radio a lot and watching the football game, UCLA vs ORE ST. hahah. she yells at the TV. wow. a girl that screams at the tv while watching a college football game. interesting. we don't have that kind of spirit at school. each one of us (students at school) are making a difference, especially since it's a new school. there's still a lot of possibilities for that school, anything could happen. right now, there is a very mature crowd, almost 40 years of age atmosphere. i'd like to see more activities like what they have at UCLA. BLACKALICIOUS is having a free concert tomorrow too. i'm jealous. oh well.
recap:at ucla
feeling: eh? i have feelings? i do.
"you can do it"- the waterboy